November 7, 2018 I received my first chemotherapy treatment! I was eager to start and ready to kick ass. But as the sessions progressed I felt weak, sad and lonely.
See, this is the thing, Cancer is a very long journey. This battle is not only physical but also emotional. Every day, you have to battle with the physical side effects plus the feelings of despair surrounding the treatment. Let me tell you it freaking sucks!
Back in July, when my journey began I felt so much support. I was ecstatic by the amount of people who would come spend time with me, who offered to help, who called, texted, sent me flowers. But like all good thigs, that came to an end! People stopped calling, texting, coming by. I am not going to lie., it hurt me so much. I couldn’t believe close friends and family were absent from something so important in my life.
Thankfully I have those who really matter, who show up ever other week after my treatment, who drove me around, who worried about my emotional state and took me out for coffee just to distract me, those who would check up on me week after week. With time I realized that I didn’t need a lot of people to be happy, I only needed those who really cared! For them, I am thankful!
Chemo is no joke. It’s hard to wake up and be positive when you know the following week you will be tortured with another infusion. So many times I wanted to quit, I contemplated convincing my doctors that I didn’t need that many session (lol that didn’t work). In the end, I did it, not because I am “strong” but because this is the only way to stay ALIVE!